Between Dusk and Darkness
by sentinel10
Summary: Not all love lasts forever. Not all love is 'supposed' to last. What will it take for them to let each other in? What will it take for them to both realise maybe a 'little', is better than nothing at all. Leah x Edward
1. Chapter 1

**I do not own Twilight**

* * *

[ Part One ]

One of the last memories of my mother is still my most vivid like it had been seared and burnt into my memory bank. I was six years old and it was a Sunday morning, late spring as I recall, my favourite of all the months. Even at six I can remember it like it was yesterday, like it was the back of my hand. Each line and coarse area of my hand could be linked with that day. That day that was one of our last.

The sun was setting low in the sky making the sweeping gardens seem even more magical as I sat in my mothers crossed lap. I watched as her small hand moved the Kolinsky sable fine tip brush, it's ends looking battered and bruised from it's excessive use, from the pot of blue paint and onto the canvas. Her arms cocooned me as I sat quietly listening to her hum and watching each articulate brush stroke she made against the Venetian sail canvas my father would bring back from his business trips, often overseas, to places far more exotic and exciting.

It was warm in her arms, her lap, even though the air was crisp and cool against my skin. She smelled like each of the flowers in the garden had crept into her perfume bottle late at night and crushed themselves into the small bottle she would spray at both her wrists and neck. The cotton hem of her dress tickled against my feet as the wind blew softly around us. The air felt cool but being so close to her, wrapped up in her aura I felt anything but. I was safe with her, much like I had always been.

I could feel her breath on the back of my neck as she chuckled lightly to herself watching my younger brother and father chase Benji the family pet around the garden. "Edward" She spoke softly in my ear, her honey voice making me feel like she was surrounding me and engulfing me in her sweetness. "My sweet sweet boy." She cooed as she rubbed my shin placing her brush down to kiss my hair, her fingers easily combing through my combed down hair.

My mother had always been much more affectionate towards me than my brother. Emmett was only two years younger but she often told me that he was strong like our dad and didn't need so much of a connection with her than I did. She used to tell me that I was special because the way I saw the world was different, much like her. She used to say that artists like ourselves could appreciate every thing so much more, that we could see past complicated and disheveled walls, to the true inner beauty that surrounded all things.

At three years old I had begun to have problems with my eyes. My parents didn't notice at first until I started to run into a lot of things and end up with concussions. They thought it was just a case of boys being boys and running and not paying attention to anything in our destructive paths. I didn't really notice much of a difference. It was as if when I looked at something my vision focused closely on it like a telescope, the outer area of my sight slowly fading and making it seem as if the light only shone on that. My mother was distraught at the doctors diagnosis that I would lose my sight fully by the time I was around eight. My mother and father quickly had my brother checked for the same genetic trait I had inherited from my mother's grandfather and I could tell they were relieved to get news that he was going to be normal. Unlike me.

By six years old I could only make out blurred figures, my sight so disparaged that my parents had taken the steps to teach me how to use my hands and senses to guide me through life before I fully needed them. When I was at home I didn't need to use my cane because I had stepped out and memorised every single piece of furniture in the house. My little brother thought it was a game and would count with me, my father making sure every morning to recite back to him the measurements. From my bed to the door, from the door to the stairs, each wooden step down, from the stairs to the kitchen. It went on and on until finally I didn't even need to count and it was more like second nature.

At night my mother would tuck me in and tell me about all the amazing things she'd seen in her life. How her and my father had been on so many adventures around the world. Adventures that I would never see, that I would never touch or be a part of. I wouldn't get to see how the sand sparkled when you stood at the edge of the pacific ocean. I would never see the lights of Paris on a cold winter night, as they dazzled and stole your breath away. I wouldn't see the rainforests of South America or the sun as it set on a warm afternoon in Italy surrounded by valley of grape vines.

At six, I didn't know any better. I didn't know how much I could miss something I had never seen. How much I wanted to see all the things I couldn't. All the things my parents had seen and all the things my brother soon would.

I'd asked my brother once what it was like to watch the stars shooting across the sky. In my mind I wasn't even sure if what I was actually remembering was a star. As I got older the memories that I clung onto so dearly seemed to escape me. When I imagined the dark hue of red, was it actually red or was it lighter, creamier like a yellow? It felt like as time went on I become more and more colour blind even though the only thing I could see was darkness. My other senses helped but still it wasn't anything like I wanted it to be.

Once my mother died my father decided it best if I was to have a home schooled education rather than being put through the pains of going to a private school. I'd begged him desperately to allow me to go. I wanted to mingle with the other children, make friends like my brother so easily made. Maybe they would like me too even if I couldn't catch a football or climb trees? Maybe they would see past the fact that I wasn't like everyone else and actually _saw_ me? My father thought it a reckless idea and decided it final for me to stay at home. Eventually I gave up and gave in to him, though under much duress.

Over the years I studied hard using the help of both my father and tutors to gain not only my GED but a college education. I wanted to be more, I wanted to be independent and not have such a heavy burden on my father to provide for me. I wanted to be someone more than the blind guy that people felt sorry for. Somehow my mother's interest in the arts was passed down and I managed to major in art history and Latin. But it was painting that stole my heart like a secret lover. A secret lover to which we made love under a starless night. Hot and heavy. Carefully mixing our scents and engulfing ourselves in the heat of passion, to create colorful, magical scenes. Even though I couldn't see the colours I tried my best to feel them and express them.

At first it was hard, setting up a studio in order for me to paint without assistance. I had Braille placed on the pots of paint and even used my mothers old sable brush and even had my father import the same canvases she used when she was alive. When I painted I felt so close to my mother it was like once again I was wrapped up in her embrace and the whole world was at my fingertips.

My father ended up giving me the house and buying a new residence with his new wife Tanya. Money gave me a lot of pleasures but there was only one thing money couldn't buy. I would have traded everything to have my sight back. Every penny in my pocket and every bar of gold in the national reserve. I would have traded even my soul just to see the sun set around me as I stood naked in the flower blossomed gardens feeling its warmth against my skin. To see the flowers littering the grounds of the old country mansion. To see my mothers grave. To see my brother marry his wife. To see my own face and look into the eyes of the lifeless man I had become.

I would have given _anything_.

* * *

Pushing back the covers I sighed reaching out to my side table and ran my fingers over my specially made alarm clock from Emmett's wife. Rose was always looking for ways to make things easier for me so I wouldn't have to rely on anybody else. She was a darl and often went out of her way for me. I appreciated the help, though I was less adamant to show it.

I could already smell the low waft of breakfast being made down stairs as it crept under my door. The birds were already up and chirping, the sound echoing against my window sill as I pulled it up and smelled the fresh air. June wasn't particularly my favourite month but the smells that accompanied the air still made me a bit more pert. The flowers on the grounds had been threatening to open for months and I couldn't wait until they finally blossomed and littered the air with perfume.

Walking across to my dresser I quickly pulled on some long cotton pyjama bottoms knowing I would soon have a visitor in the form of one Ms Renesmee Cullen. Emmett and Rosie had been so excited knowing that they were going to have a daughter, let alone a baby. It had been Rosie's dream come true, and true to Emmett's personality, whatever made Rose happy made him happy as well. She was a little ray of sunshine and my only confidant. Over the years she became the closest thing I had to a friend besides her parents.

As if exactly on time, a small knock sounded against the pine of my bedroom door. "Uncle Edward" Her small voice whispered, making my smile stretch wide over my face. "Uncle Edward, I have the jelly beans" She whispered again, though this time with much more urgency. Renesmee knew that she wasn't allowed sweets before lunchtime, even though on the sly her father would secretly sneak her small packets of jelly beans, like those at the chemist, which we would share before her mother would call us for breakfast.

Cracking open my door, I heard her shuffle through and quickly hug my legs before pulling me by the hand over to the bed. I allowed her to lead me and I sat first, before I felt the bed shift and her weight lightly indented the portion of the mattress next to me. "I call the blue and yellow ones" I tried to keep my face sullen, not to reveal my amusement.

"But uncle Edward-" She whined, bouncing a little in her place. "-You called blue _yesterday_. The rule is one day, one colour. You _can't_ have blue"

I knew Nessie's favourite colour was blue and I almost always beat her to the punch of calling colours. We liked to alternate between days and we often ended up sharing them anyway. I was a big sucker for Nessie. Even at six she seemed so much more older than she was. Like an old soul.

"Fine Ness. Red it is" I chuckled as she kicked her legs against the mattress.

"That's my colour too" She huffed, her small fingers ripping open the plastic and lifting my hand so she could count them out evenly.

"Red, Orange, Green, Green, Yellow, Blue" She sung happily as she counted out the beans and parted them in my palm.

After we'd happily eaten all the sugary delights we lay back on to the bed, our legs swinging off the end. We often enjoyed the silence and to be extremely truthful I enjoyed being next to someone so sweet and pure. She often commented that she wished I would get married so she could be a flower girl at my wedding, and that she really wished she had cousins to play with.

"Edward" She whispered, my name making me cringe a little when it came with the inquisitive voice of my niece I knew so well.

"What is it Ren?" I tort back, feeling her tiny hands rubbing my forearm.

"When you get married, I want you to make me a cousin real fast"

"And why is that?" I asked, shaking my head a little and trying to hide my smile.

"Because I don't have any friends except for you. The other kids think I'm weird."

I couldn't help but chuckle. "You're not werid little one. You're just different. Smarter" I nodded as I felt her shift on my bed to sit cross legged next to me.

"But I don't _want _to be different. I want to be the same as the other children. I want to play with them and not feel like I have to pretend. Don't you ever want to be like that?" She said softly. "Don't you ever just want to walk down the street without mumma holding your hand? Don't you want to be able to see me?"

More than anything I wanted to fall to my knees and cry out that she was right. That I had wanted to be normal all my life. That I would do anything to be a stupid bleep in the eyes of corporate American and work a demeaning desk job, drink with my friends at a sports bar and make love to a beautiful woman I could actually see. Swallowing I sighed and sat back up on the bed. "I just want to be a normal kid" She whimpered. I could smell her tears as they welled in her eyes. The salty spray threatening to drip down and stain her soft little cheeks.

"Honey" I said wrapping her up in a hug and petting her curly hair. "Sometimes it's better to be different. You think anyone who has ever made anything with their lives was normal. Normal is boring. Normal people do the same thing, day in and day out. They have no spark in their lives, no excitement. Ness - find what you love and do it with your whole heart. Even if people tell you you're different. People are scared of things that are different. _People _- that are different." I said with so much belief in my voice. Deep down I hoped that by convincing her, somehow I would convince myself.

* * *

"So... do you two have anything planned today?" Rosalie asked as she packed away the remains of our breakfast.

"Dad is going to take me into town and we are going to the bookstore. Though I think he only wants to go because there is a gaming store next to it. Did you know Daddy paid $100 for one of the new games." Nessie replied as she slurped on her orange juice. I couldn't help but snigger at my brother's actions. In many ways he was still a child trapped in the huge body of a man. I always wondered why Emmett got all the height in the family. By all means I wasn't a pip squeak but still his huge hulky figure towering next to me made _me _feel like the child.

"That's nice honey" Rosalie sung in her bell like voice as she ran the taps of the huge kitchen. I often wondered why her and Emmett were still living with me. They had told me it would only be temporary until they found a house they both could agree on. It wasn't a case of money, as my father provided handsomely for us both and Emmett and Rosalie both worked, Emmett being the top dog at one of the construction companies in the city and Rosalie a legal aid lawyer. They had been looking for a house since they got married - and that was 6 years ago. Pity was the only thing I could think of as to why they stayed. Sure, Rosalie could be a bitch and sometimes had the tongue of a snake, but she was also loving and her motherly side far out weighed everything else.

Most times I wanted to kick, scream and bitch at her about her insane habit of making sure what ever I wanted was catered for. I felt like a fucking infant. Ironing, washing, cooking, cleaning. She wouldn't stop. She'd even stoup so low as to arrange my cupboards for me, in colour order, by type. I did appreciate it deep down but I just wanted to be free of all the hassle. I mean, did it really matter if I wore a white shirt with cream trousers? I never really left the house anyway, except under the strict order of my brother, so I couldn't have cared less about what I wore.

"Edward? What about you?" Rose asked before I could make out the heavy drudging footsteps of my brother coming down the steps.

"Yeah Eddy-kins" He mocked as he came up behind me and ruffled my hair. "What are you up to today boy? I thought maybe we could hit a couple of bars later tonight. My Rosey here wants us to take out her brother and his friend tonight. Show them the ropes if you know what I mean. Make it a boys night" His loud voice boomed in my ear followed by a hearty chuckle.

I wanted to smack Emmett for messing with my hair as I tamed the strands back down with a grimace on my face. "Yeah sure Emmett. How about I be sober bob tonight?" I replied dryly, placing my hands on the table and pushing the chair back with my calves.

"Oh come on little brother. Jasper is relying on us the show him some hospitality. Isn't that right baby?" Emmett cooed, probably standing with his wife. I could hear her giggle as he petted kisses on her face, her swatting him away as he continued to do so.

"I may be smaller than you but don't forget who the older brother is!" I scolded, wanting to go back to my room and listen to music to calm my, now disturbed, day.

"See Rosey" He whined, his voice muffled by his wifes shoulder. "He always plays dirty. Tell him he has to come out with the boys" Emmett was always such a baby with Rose. It was a wonder he didn't ask her to dress him too. Hell - I hope she did. I didn't want to be the only man Rosalie outright owned.

"Edward" Rosalie sighed. "You don't have to go with them if you don't want."

"Traitor" Emmett barked making me huff out a breath as the giggling continued. If they weren't so cute together, they'd be sickening. I mean sure I was happy for them both, but is still couldn't dwell my jealousy. I would never have a wife, a perfect little girl, the perfect life. I would never see my children, I would never watch them grow or develop. I would never watch as they took their first steps or the first time they smiled at me.

As I toured my own depression I didn't notice the room suddenly become quiet. "You okay Ed?" Emmett asked quietly, placing a hand on my shoulder.

"Fine" I waved him off, stepping towards the door with my fingertips brushing the edge of the frame. "I'll think about it alright? But I promise nothing" I said softly as I left the happy family to bask in their own awesomeness.

* * *

"I'm going to fucking kill you Jasper Hale" I screamed, making the car swerve as I attempted to snatch the phone back out of his hands. But the asshole didn't even deter and kept reading the message on my phone.

_'I can't believe how sexy you are. I can't get you out of my head. Where the fuck are you? I need you baby'_ He laughed as he scrolled down to complete the rest of the embarrassing text. I threw my hands up in the air and let him have his fun.

_'You're such a hot kitten. I'd love to run my tougne-'_ Okay, that was enough.

"Jasper!" I screamed taking another swipe at him and missing completely. I knew the moment I pulled this car over I was going to rip my blonde best friend to pieces. Him and his pretty face. "Give me the phone right now or I am going to kill you and hide your body amongst all these white collar manisons." I growled, gritting my teeth tightly together and shooting him my best 'Don't fuck with me glare'.

"But kitten-" He drawled out in his deep southern accent as he batted his eyelashes at me. "I'm having so much fun. Let's see what else Brady sent you" The stupid jerk loved to see my cheeks light up like the forth of July, and if he wasn't screwing a hot chick I would have defintely suspected something was up. He was such a fucking girl sometimes.

"Urgh - You're such a dick face" I grumbled, this time becoming successful in snatching the black piece of technology out of his hands. "You're such a girl" I grumbled as I flipped my phone down and stuffed it into my jeans. "You're worse than my baby cousin Clair, who can't keep her nose out of other people's business. You both just don't know when to quit!"

"Eh-" He waved me off with a flick of his wrist. "I knew you were fucking him anyways" The smug smile he wore on his face made me want to crash the passenger side into a tree and watch him burn and turn to ash. Yeah he was my best friend but sometimes the way he grinded on every single one of my nerve endings made me just want to do bad things to him. And they weren't _good _bad things.

"Bullshit" I snapped back, squeezing the steering wheel tighter until my knuckles turned white. "You didn't know anything. How could you? Your crystal ball told you or maybe it was your freaky girlfriend?" I grinned to the last part knowing Jasper hated when I ragged on Alice. Alice the Midget. Alice the small Emo screwball. Alice in fucking Wonderland. She was seriously two steps off having tea with that smug looking mad hatter.

"Oh honey, I do have my ways." He whispered, patting my thigh before I reached out and punched his chest, striking him with the butt of my fist.

"Ow" He pretended, rubbing across his front.

"Blow me Hale. You wouldn't be able to notice a hooker in a brothel, let alone tell that I was screwing my brother's best friend. It would only be if somebody told you." I glared, waiting for the confession that would never come.

"Whatever you say Leah" He drawled again leaning his ass into the leather seats and crossing his arms across his chest.

"You're lucky you are my best friend otherwise you would be sporting a nice black and blue eye around about now" I hissed, inching the accelerator down to pick up speed on the long straight and boring road. Mansion after mansion whizzed by and it felt like I'd been led into some kind of rich suburban twilight zone. The houses were all the same except that they varied slightly. One with blue frames shutters, one with a wrap around verandah. One with yellow framed shutters and roses in the flower beds. A far cry from the small inner city apartment I'd grew up in.

"I could take you" He shrugged staring out the window and waving to a couple of kids on their bikes.

"The hell you could!"

"Don't forget Leah, I am not _only _your first friend but your first lover" He grinned as he wiggled his eyebrows in my direction. I made a mental note to sneak into his room with a razor later that night. Let's see him wiggle them then.

"Fuck!" I shuddered, brushing the hair that was tickling my neck away from me like it was a bug. "Please don't remind me"

"That truly hurts my feelings Leah" He gasped playfully placing a hand over his heart.

"Truly?" I asked with a raised eyebrow and a small smile.

"Truly my dear."

"You know my back _still _fucking hurts right?" I laughed as he began to frown. I loved taking shots at his larger than life ego. Especially when it came to awkward teenage sex.

"Surely it wasn't _that _bad?" He asked this time with a slither more seriousness in his tone.

"Jasper - we were sixteen. You tried to get me to ride you bareback while I held onto your shoulders. I didn't even get a decent amount of foreplay. And _you're _supposed to be the romantic one." I chuckled shaking my head. "Plus, it's not eveyday you fall back onto a coffee table when your trying to get you rocks off"

"Fair call" He replied shrugging his shoulders again. "Though if you'd like, we could always try again. And this time I get to show _you _some tricks"

"Oh hell no. I think I had enough of the Jasper express to last me a life time"

The uneasiness soon rolled away as he began giving me directions to his sister's place. Twin sister to be exact. This was going to be so weird, finally meeting the sister that he used to talk about all the fucking time. I was sick of hearing Rosalie's name before I even had the chance to meet her. "So..." I started flicking the indicator as I pulled on to a new asphalt road. "It's just going to be me, you, your sister and her family?" I asked turning down the radio as we drove past a set of huge black gates. Creepy I tell you.

"Yeah, that about sums it up. My sister is a little bit of a control freak but Emmett's cool. Nessie is -well - a kid. Her husbands brother also lives there though. I think I met him once at the wedding but other that - nothing. "

"What?" I asked unbelieving the blonde boy. "What are they? Some kind of sick threesome deal? Who would want there brother to live with them. Hell - imagine if I got married and Seth wanted to move in."

"That's supposing you ever get married" Jasper grinned poking my cheek, as I tried to slap his hand away.

"Shut up"

Shaking his head Jasper sighed. "You'll know what I mean when we get there"

"Is he some kind of freak or something?" I asked a little more intrigued now because of the change in mood.

"No nothing like that. He's just - _different_" I could almost hear the volcano's of curiosity explode in my mind. He was definitely hiding something. This wasn't the Jasper I knew. "Anyway" He started, trying to change the subject. "At least you'll get to meet my niece. I haven't seen her since she was a baby and I bet she's just adorable now as she was back then"

I couldn't help but snort at his comment. "Don't get all clucky on me now Hale" I teased placing my hand over his tight stomach muscles.

"Ha Ha Asswater! Very funny" He grumbled, throwing my hand off his stomach.

"Oh come on love - I swear you're not getting fat at all" I taunted poking his belly. "I'll still love you even when you look like you swallowed a beach ball"

"You wait Clearwater, one day your going to be pregnant, bloated and pissed off. When that day comes I am going to get my revenge" Jasper stated solemnly making me roll my eyes.

"Please - _If _that day comes, I'll be ready" I said smugly, pretending to flex my non existent biceps.

We let a calm silence take over the cabin of the car as the outline of a huge white house started to edge closer to us in the distance. I only took less than a minute to drive up the sprawled out lush garden's, past a few garden keepers, before we stopped in the semi arched driveway of Jasper's sisters place. "Holy Shit!" I muttered. "Who do these people think they are?"

"Shhh... no taunting the rich people." Jasper laughed placing his index finger over my lips making me want to slap him.

"Jesus Hale" I huffed, pushing his arm away. "I don't want that finger anywhere near my mouth. God only knows where it has been-"

Quickly, like the sharp minded bastard he is, he shot out the worst thing I ever wanted to hear. "Not only has it been in Alice's pussy - but in yours too" He laughed, unbuckling his belt and hoping out of the car.

"Fuck you Hale! That was one time!" I growled as I followed suit and made a bee line around the car to jump on his back until he was screaming like a bitch boy. When I got around the car, I launched at him, tackling him to the ground and allowing the both of us to roll on the drive like idiots. "I'm going to kill you if you ever mention that again" I hissed in his face, my fists balled around his collar.

My eyes widen as he took a deep breath and began to shout "I finger fucked Leah Clearwater and she can't get enough! Help! She's attacking me! She's wants me so~o bad!"

"Take it back" I yelled, trying to thwart his attempts of rolling himself into a better position.

"Never!" He laughed as he flipped us over. Resting his forearms near my head I couldn't help but smile up at him, idiot or not. "You're fucking crazy Clearwater" He smiled back making my cheeks almost discolour. "And that's why I love you" He cooed, pinching my cheek and earning himself a sharp jab from two of my fingers in his ribs.

"And I love you too fat ass. Now get off and let's meet the freaks"


	2. Chapter 2

**I do not own Twilight**

* * *

[ Part Two ]

"Jasper?" A woman's voice gasped as the front door to the biggest house I'd ever seen opened. Her nails were perfectly manicure as they clamped over her mouth, a big sparkling ring almost blinding me and taking out my eyes. Some people just loved to flaunt their happiness over everyone, especially those who were bitter towards a happy ending like myself. "Oh my gosh! You look so different!" She almost squealed as she launched herself into Jaspers arms.

Jasper hushed her and petted her hair whispering something soft and sweet into her ear which made me mad. I hated when people spoke in low tones. I mean, shit, if you're going to say something why not let everyone know instead of keeping it from the class.

I could already smell the floral scented perfume as it drifted from the blonde woman's hair. Some kind of lavender and rhodesia scented shampoo I bet. Instinctively I grabbed a strand of my own hair and sniffed. Damn. I really needed some of that stuff she had washed her hair with. Mine was still teased and pulled back tightly, my fringe clipped up into an almost egg roll looking shape. The band in my hair was starting my make my ears hurt from how much it was pulled. Stupid fucking make up and hair crew. I mean seriously, I probably would never need a face lift if they kept this style up, not counting the fact that I could be totally bald by the time I was thirty due to the amount of chemicals and shit they doused in it.

"Hey Rosey. You're looking great" Jasper sighed, his blue eyes closing as he rested his cheek on top of her hair, making me feel super awkward. "How've you been sis" He whispered, pulling her back by her shoulders and giving her a once over. She looked pretty okay from where I was standing. I mean holy mother of all that is good and expensive - she was living in a fucking palace, the gardens were tended to by smaller lower class hoodlums like the ones I'd grown up next door to. Their cars even sparkled in the sun light. Looking back at my ride I sighed. It really need a good cut, polish and wax.

"You too. You cut you're hair, you look so young" She exclaimed, touching the short ends of his hair before her eyes landed on me. I really hated that look she was giving me right about now. The old oh-so-_this_-is-your-friend look. _Best friend_, I mentally snapped, grinding my teeth together and making a note that I should definitely go to the dentist more often before I had no teeth left to saw away on. My anger often got the better of me. "Oh is this Alice?" Jasper's sister asked making him burst out laughing, which made me want to sock him one. Sure, I was used to it by now, but man, I do have feelings you know.

"No Rosey. This is Leah" Jasper grinned clasping my hand and drawing me closer. "My best friend in the whole wide world" He continued, pressing a lazy kiss to my temple. I could feel that his sister was uncomfortable with the show of attention. As she understood it, Jasper and Alice where going stronger than ever before in their relationship and I had that gut feeling that she thought I was the mistress or something.

"Hmmm" She frowned, giving her brother a disapproving stare and almost measuring the distance between us with her eyes. "I see. The way you talked about your friend made me believe it was a _guy _friend. But of course you meant Lee as in Leah" Her stance had turned from welcoming us in to shooing away a couple of bums almost instantly. She didn't like me - though I didn't blame her. Me and half of the female population were at war. I'd never been good with the same sex and more often than not only seemed to have male friends.

"I've heard a lot about you. Jasper here talks me into a headache about you" I said awkwardly trying to wriggle out of Jasper's embrace only to be clung to harder. His fingers were definitely going to leave bruises in my hips.

"Unfortunatley I can't say the same for you" She replied staunchly making me close my eyes tightly before opening them again. She was crossing bitchy borders that no one dared to cross with me. If she thought I was one of those suck-it-up-and-deal girls, she was horribly mistaken. My take on life was more bitch-what-the-hell-did-you-just-say. Before I could even open my mouth to reply, Jasper's voice appeared which seemed to calm the mood.

"Rosey - we've been travelling for five hours. How bout you let us in and we can chat - just the two of us"

Giving me a small narrowed look she finally turned back to Jasper, nodded and sighed as she pushed open the doors, just enough for us to squeeze by.

The house was even more spectacular inside. There was an old spiralling staircase leading what looked to be heaven. The carpets that ran along the wooden polished floors were plush, streams of white fur leading in all directions and I wanted nothing more than to kick off the sneakers I had on and rub my toes in it like I would the sand at the beach. It looked _that _good. It wanted to purr and pet it like it was a polar bear, which seemed way more awesome in my head than it would have been in real life.

There was plenty of natural light streaming into through the dozens of glass windows that seemed to cover the wall facing the gardens. If the window panes hadn't been attached it probably would have looked like there was no glass at all. Even the furniture around the place was insane. Black leather, tan hide leather, some kind of silky tasselled pillows, coffee tables the size of mine and jaspers dinning table in the apartment we shared in New York. I mean, yeah, me and Jasper did pretty good with money, our jobs didn't really have us in one place at a time long, but still, this shit was amazing! My whole months pay check was probably equal to the giant crystal vase which was situated on the mantel filled with fresh tiger lilies. I immediately hated her more out of pure jealousy. I couldn't even bring myself to order flower deliveries for the apartment, let alone pick them from the gardens and arrange them. Hate, hate, _hate _her!

"Please make yourself at home Leah." Rosalie grumbled as she dragged her brother away into another room so my nosy ears couldn't hear. I wanted to poke my tongue out at her and give the bitch the finger. God! I only just met her and I hate her. She was nothing like Jasper! Jasper was cool, calm and totally fucking awesome, she on the other hand was like a pompous, snotty little rich girl. The kind of girl I used to get expelled for punching in the playgrounds in middle school. Like I said, me and females equals war.

"Make yourself at home" I mimicked under my breathe pulling a snotty face and waiving my hand in the air like I was the queen leaving Buckingham palace. "Pttf! Bleach blonde cunt!"

"I always thought I had bronze hair" A voice sounded behind me making me just about topple over the couch with fright. What the fuck it this place? Creepers are us?

"Jesus" I gasped grabbing my chest and spinning around. "You scared the shit out of me"

Standing at the bottom of the stairs was a pretty fucking decent looking guy. He looked about 6 foot 2, just only inches taller than myself, though if I had been wearing heels I would definitely give him a run for his money. He was pale and definitely needed a fucking tan but he was nice and toned. His body looked tight and although he was a little rough around the edges he was very nice eye candy. Meaning, yeah, I'd fuck him.

"Sorry." He mumbled as a small flash of red rose in his cheeks and neck. I arched my eyebrow at him wondering if this guy was actually serious. He was blushing? "Have you seen Rosalie come past here?" He asked in his smooth voice as he held a black sock in his hand by his side.

"Jasper and her are having a heart to heart" I grumbled, crossing my arms against my chest. "What's with the sock?" I jerked my chin up, motioning to the material in his hand.

"Oh" He replied tucking the sock quickly behind his back. "I just needed her help with something" He murmured as the blush came back again with a vengeance. I rolled my eyes at him to no affect. What the hell was wrong with guy? Has he never spoken to a woman before?

We stood awkwardly in the same room for a while as he continued to look at his hands and I watched him intently. It was weird as hell, not that I was up myself or anything but usually men couldn't take their eyes off me and this guy just continued to stare at his fingers. He looked nervous or irritated or both, I couldn't tell. He was like a strange _pretty _Muppet. He had those kinds of looks that were weird but at the same time captivating. His eyes were a gentle ocean like colour, mixed between that sea like blue and a dark deep green. His nose was straight and his jaw sharp. _Ohhh _- I could so trail my tongue along that jaw.

"Did you want me to help you or whatever?" I asked sick of having to look at him twiddle that fucking sock in his hands. I wanted to reef it out of his hands and slap that back of his head, scold him and send him to his room. I was truely losing my mind. And by losing my mind I meant turning into my mother.

"I don't want to put you out" He said quietly as if he was speaking to himself. Now I really wanted to hurt him, maybe claw him and tell him to grow a fucking back bone. He was so submissive it made me wonder if there was something wrong with him. Obviously this wasn't Rosalie's husband - or maybe it was and she kept him tied in a basement and spanked him. Maybe she was a fucking dominatrix with all the leather and whips and shit. I felt a shudder moved up my spine imaging the oh-so-wrong things she would make him do.

_Jealous_? A small voice sounded in my head making me want to deny the fact until I was blue in the face.

"It's fine" I snapped failing my hands in the air and walking towards him. "Leah" I announced holding my hand out to him to shake. I may not have been a nice girl but I definitely had manners. My parents had taught me that much.

"Edward" He smiled pointing to himself. "Nice to meet you Leah" Turning on his heel he left me standing in the doorway with my jaw slack and my hand dangling in the wind. _Fuckward_! That's what he was. I felt the anger burn through my spine and land in my cheeks, heating them immediately. This guy was a complete asshole. I try to be polite and shake his hand and he just walks away with his nose up at me. Okay yeah, he didn't walk away like the other snobby bitch but still.

Stomping after him I followed him up the stairs and made sure that he could hear every single step because I was pissed though the Muppet looked pleased as hell as he lead me into a room and pointed to a chest of drawers that had the top pried open. "I don't mean to be a pain but I can't seem to find my other black sock. If you could take a look I would be very grateful" He asked, his words making me even angrier and I couldn't help mimic him silently like the posh dick head he was.

"So you're Jasper's girlfriend?" He asked quietly as he sat down on the bed behind me.

"No. Jasper has a girlfriend, and trust me, I'm not it" I laughed while digging around in the drawer looking for his stupid black sock. His socks were so neatly arranged I was not sure how he could even lose the damn thing. Maybe he ate it? Maybe he jerked off in it and it was under his bed? I felt a tingle in my lower regions and scolded myself. I was a slut. A raging slut that got hot thinking about this weirdo jerking into a sock. I had major problems that needed attention, much bigger problems than that of a lost sock.

"Can I ask why you are with Jasper then?" He asked, frowning as I turned on my heel to give him an unbelievable look. "I don't know any man that would travel with a woman who did not _belong _to him."

Instead of having my own internal rant I let it all slip out, by accident of course. "Belong to him? What fucking era do you live in? Me and Jasper are _just _friends, and the way you are 'insinuating'" Yeah I totally air quoted "our relationship makes me sound like some kind of a whore. Yeah that's right, I know big words. I don't know about you Ed-_fuck_-head but maybe you need to look up the meaning of having friends because you obviously don't have any." I snapped walking up to him and shoving the stupid sock in his chest. "Here's your fucking sock"

I fled out of the room before I could cause anymore damage and be kicked out of _mansion de snob_. I didn't want to jepordise Jasper's time with his sister but this was getting really old, _really _fast. I made my way back down to the living area and scowled the shelves for the jackpot.

"Bingo" I grumbled out, pulling down the crystal bottle and matching glasses. I had no clue why rich people didn't just put the whole bottle on display instead of pouring it into these freaky crystal cases. I mean yeah it's pretty but seriously? It doesn't taste different and it sure as shit doesn't make you any more intoxicated.

Pouring myself a triple shot I plopped myself down into the brown leather and cooed at it. It felt nice against my heated skin and pressing the cold glass to my face helped cooled my temper down as well. Taking a long sip I smacked my lips together relishing the burn as it slid down my throat. If I was going to stay here a couple of days I was certain that I would have to be way _way _over the legal limit to drive. That way I wouldn't be able escape and keep my promise to Jasper. And _this _is exactly why I don't have friends. The whole being bullied into going to meet the family and spend quantity time with them shit, was _so _junior high. I knew Jasper, hence, why the fuck would I want to know his family? I liked him, not the creepers he was related to.

Groaning, I allowed myself to sink back into the chair and attempted to pull a hand through my hair. It felt really disgusting having a whole bottle of hairspray in it and for it to be teased like it was the local puppy locked behind metal mesh. I really hated the fact that New York city made me a bitter, angry, self loathing bitch. It was like a fucking trend and me being me, I just wanted to fit in. Both Jasper and I had always been those pretty people who didn't give a fuck, who sat on the park bench in over sized jumpers laughing at people who ran after their crazy kids at the park or tried to fight off the bums asking them for money. We'd often sit there for hours just laughing and giggling into each other's shoulders trying to catch our breathes. Sometimes we'd actually be serious and sit out on the fire escape and share a bottle of wine and a joint. But that all changed once he met Alice.

It wasn't like I didn't like her. She was cute and he was obviously head over heels for her and vice versa which made him happy. Another problem with friends - watching them being happy when you're not. I know it was fucking selfish to feel that way but I just felt like I was left out and Alice had replaced me, with her shiny shoes and her big brown doe like eyes. Not that it matter right? Because I was Leah Clearwater, bad ass New York City model, owner of a brand new cappuccino machine - which I still had to figure out how to use, who was fucking one of the sexist pieces of man meat on wall street and partying until my feet blistered.

Sighing I placed the cool glass on my forehead again. Who the fuck was I kidding? I was as alone as I'd been in years.

The low buzz of my cell phone startled me out of my thoughts and like the moron I was, I answered it without checking the caller ID. "What?" I snapped into the phone, taking another dreary sip of the brown liquid. I didn't really take blondey for a scotch drinker but kudos to her taste buds if this was hers. I bet she even paid a ridiculous price for it when I could have gone down to the corner store and brought a litre for twenty bucks.

"Hey baby, where are you? My dick misses you" Well hello to you too fucker. God, maybe I was some kind of a dirty slut.

"Brady" I grimaced not really in the mood to be dirty talked into coming back to the city. Sure he was a good lay but holy shit the guy could talk. And I just don't mean in a particular situation. I mean, the fucker didn't stop talking. He went on and on like his life depended on it. No wonder him and my brother were best buds or whatever gay shit they had going on. I didn't want to know so I didn't ask any questions.

"Are you coming back soon? I'm getting sick of jacking off to the pictures on my phone" He whined in my ear like a baby. "I just wanna see you, where are you anyway? Hanging out with that faggot again?" And just like that, the anger came back.

"Go fuck yourself Bray. Jasper isn't gay you asshole. He has a girlfriend! And stop using that fucking word, you know I hate it. It's so fucking nasty!" I knew I was a bitch but those kinds of words just didn't sit well with me. I had a lot of male friends who were totally into dick but that word was just so wrong, in so many ways.

"Yeah - well I have a girlfriend too, and I am starting to wonder where the fuck mine always is! You better not be off fucking someone else Leah because you know what will happen if you leave me" He mocked, acting like he was some kind of gods gift to women. Lately his confidence astounded me but it wasn't really confidence. He'd become a cocky donkey raping asshole.

"Yeah I _do _know what will happen. You'll lose all feeling in your wrist from the RSI you're developing, you fuck!" I snapped angrily wanting to tear his balls off. Instead I just tore my poor phone in half and shoved it back in my pocket. I didn't want to hear it. Brady was just a sex crazy fifteen year old stuck in the body of a stockbroker. He was definitely sexy but the ways he was acting, like I was some kind of possession, pissed me off to no end. Even during sex I swear he tried to piss on me to stake his claim or whatever it was dogs did.

I could hear the soft patter of his feet before he appeared in the doorway and I wondered if he wore loafers or he was just naturally light on his feet._ Like a fairy_. I couldn't help but snort at my mental snipe at Mr Rosey cheeks himself. I tried to ignore him as he strode into the room and sat down on the arm of the chair, a frown on his pretty face. I knew he was here to apologise and I was actually wanting to hear it. I guess I should also say something for my outburst as well.

"I'm sorry" We both said at the same time, making us both chuckle under our breathes. Clinking the glass down on the coffee table I rubbed my hands up and down my face, while he scratched the back of his neck.

"You have nothing to apologise for Ms Leah. It was wrong of me to suggest that women belong to men. What I actually meant to ask was, how could your husband be comfortable with you travelling here with Rosalie's brother?" His voice was sincere and he actually sounded apologetic.

"Well for starters if I had a husband I'd imagine he'd be pissed but that still wouldn't have stopped me. Jasper asked me to come, and what kind of friend would I be if I said no?" I answered, reaching for the crystal and pouring myself another drink.

"You're single?"

"Yeah just recently. You want one?" I asked with a raised eyebrow, motioning to the alcohol in my hands by raising it a little.

"What is it?" He asked, walking around the chair and sitting beside me at the end of the brown leather couch.

"Some kind of Scotch" I answered, pouring him a drink and handing him the glass. His hand was no where near mine as he reached for it so I had to guide the glass to his hand. I almost whimpered when his fingers brushed against mine, landing in the spaces to take the glass from me. The hairs on the back of my neck rose and I had to let out a cough as we both just sat holding on to the glass awkwardly. His hards were soft and as I leaned closer I could smell traces of a sweet perfume. It was entrancing and like a bee to honey I wanted to rub my nose in it, against it. If it was aftershave it smelt a hell of a lot like the tiger lilies on the mantle.

With a chuckle Edward pulled the glass from my hands and sat it on his lap. "Did you just _smell _me?" He asked with an unsure smile on his face.

All I could do was gawk at him and shake my head furiously. "Uh - no." I answered simply, clearing my throat. "No it's just-" Lie goddamn it, lie "the flowers on the mantel, they're quiet strong. The smell I mean"

_Idiot_, I scolded myself.

"I see" He answered as he took a sip from his glass. I couldn't help but burst out laughing as he drank a whole gulp of the liquid and almost immediately spat it back into the glass.

"Holy shit" He gasped, shaking his head like a puppy with a bee on his nose. "It's horrible. How do you drink this stuff?" He asked as he sneered at the glass and placed in on the coffee table.

Trying to speak while I laughed made me sound like an idiot "I can't believe - why did you - oh god make it stop" I gasped for air as I held my side, my cheeks heating up and my chest caving in on itself from the cackle that was leaving my lips.

"I'm glad you find me amusing" He grumbled as his hands ran over the leather. His fingers stretched a little too far and his pinky brushed my thigh causing me to snap my mouth shut immediately while he pulled his hand away. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to touch you" He said quickly, looking down at his lap and twirling his fingers.

_Wow _- this guy was way too worried.

"Trust me, those legs feel way better without the jeans on" Jasper said smugly from the door frame as he leaned against it looking over the both of us on the couch.

"Shut up you!" I sneered, giving him the dirtiest look I could muster. He was the one that left me here in the first place.

"How are you Edward? It's been a while" Jasper said lightly, patting Edward on the shoulder in that weird man way, were they don't get too close to one another.

"Good Jasper. Yourself?" Edward asked as he straightened himself on the couch looking a little nervous.

"What can I say man - I'm in love and I have the two most beautiful women in the world in my life" He said joyously as he sat down in between us, squishing me into the arm rest. Jasper's smile turned into a grin as he noticed both Edward and myself grimace at the word love. I swear the fucker wanted to test how much I could take until I combusted into a ball of flames.

Laying an arm over both our shoulder's, Jasper smirked and winked at me "So - what have you kids been up to while I was talking to Rosey?" He implied more than he was leading on which made me slap the back of his head.

"You're a tool." I huffed before smiling again. "Edward and I were just talking about the wonders of scotch" I said, giggling to myself a little.

"And of course tiger lilies" The Muppet fucker smirked as he rose from the seat, letting Jasper's arm fall from his neck. "Nice to talk with you both. Leah it was a pleasure and Jasper welcome back" He left the room quickly before I could ask what he meant by 'welcome back'.

Jasper turned to me and kissed my shoulder, before biting down on the skin there making me yelp. "Ouch you shit for brains! What the hell was that for!" I yelled pushing him away from me and trying to move his arm.

The only reply I got a fleeting smile and a wink before he spoke. "You're a bad, bad girl Lee"

Rolling my eyes, I pushed away from him and poured myself another drink. The scotch was good and Jasper was pissing me off. "I have no idea what you're talking about Hale" I murmured against the rim of the glass, giving him only a side glance.

"Really?" He stated, rolling his own eyes and snatching my glass away.

"Hey asshole-"

"Now - were going out tonight and I expect you to be on your best behaviour" He grinned, downing the rest of the brown liquid.

"Aren't I always?" I said smugly, leaning back into the couch.

Jasper snorted at my statement and pressed his tongue against the inside of his cheek, motioning also with his hand.

"Fuck you - that was one time!" I screeched as I jumped on top of him to make the crude gesture stop. Probably wasn't the best idea because at that moment, Rosalie, decided to walk in the room to find us wrestling on the couch.

* * *

AN - You can all thank **InsanelyxLOUD** for this chapter! She gave me the secret way to get around that stupid Error Message 2. *shakes fist at error message* 5 DAYS! That is how long this has been ready for! 5 DAYS!


	3. Chapter 3

**I do not own Twilight**

* * *

[ Part Three ]

I sat on the bed glaring at the jeans hanging over the back of the gold trimmed antique chair. They seemed to be mocking me, hanging there all smug like, smiling like a cat. Yeah, okay so I admit, they were my evil jeans. And by evil I didn't mean they made me look fat... well hell, that was a lie... but it was almost as if they accentuated my ass. It wasn't a bad ass I can admit that. It was just with Rosalie catching me wrapped up in Jasper on the couch trying to bite him back, I didn't really want her to think I was trying to lure Jasper into my pussy trap. My evil jeans guaranteed 'getting dry fucked on the dance floor' as Jasper so eloquently put it.

Technically the pussy trap boat had sailed a long time ago anyway. I shouldn't have cared that Rosalie Hale thought I was the evil incarnate of some cock sucking succubus - but I did. She was Jasper's sister, and he cared for her and of course me being the most awesome friend that I was, I was made by default to feel the same way. Another reason friends sucked. I could barely keep my own life on track and somehow I had to help them as well.

Rolling my eyes I snatched the jeans off the chair and pulled them up. Throwing myself on the bed I held my breath and attempted to do up the button. Shit! I guess it had been a while since I'd used these bad boys. I wondered why that stupid Angela bitch - who was currently hauled up with my mother - had been staring at me the other day. She was obviously silently telling me with her wide eyes that I'd put on a little weight. Bitch! Not that I cared. I wasn't a supermodel like Jasper, I didn't do Versace and Dolce. I did bikinis and leather. Motorbikes and X-treme brands. I needed to have that hard yet curv-i-licious figure and if my ass got a little big well who cared. I'm sure all the teenage boys and guys in prison's that read the mags I was in would appreciate if my behind ate my bikini bottoms a little. A little skin never killed anyone.

While I happened to be hissing and spitting at my jeans, using expletives to convince the button to close, I hadn't heard the door open. Rolling on to my stomach I sighed into the bed spread and balled the material, bouncing my forehead against it a couple of times out of frustration. I needed to get these jeans on - I _needed _these jeans.

A chuckle and the smell of smoke drifted towards me and I all but swore at the nice floral sheets.

"Jasper" I grimaced, rolling onto my back and sitting up on my elbows so I could glare at the blonde male that had gotten me in trouble earlier. He smelled of fresh cigarette and I wanted to slap the crown of his head for not letting me know he was going to sneak away from _Mansion de snob_ for a smoke.

Looking over him, he was already dressed, his black jeans and dark blue shirt making me want to punch him. He was wearing the men's version of my evil jeans. With his cute butt wrapped up in all that denim I knew tonight I'd have to scowl extra hard at the women that would be trying to jump his bones in my presence. I may have not been besties with Alice, but it would be a cold day in hell before I let one of those skanks touch her man.

"Need some help there?" He asked, cocking his head to the side and giving me one of those grins that made me feel like an idiot. Stupid pretty boy.

"No" I snapped trying to pull the button closed once again, this time making it _just _touch. I'd almost had it, and I didn't have time to snap it shut before Jasper pushed my hands away and pulled the material together making me squeak.

"There you go baby" He mused, patting my thigh and moving toward the antique chair to take a seat. His blonde hair was wisping in front of his eyes and it made me want to pull his hair and bite his cheek.

"I'm not your baby" I growled as I crawled off the bed and checked myself in the mirror. The jeans were just a little uncomfortable but they made me look like sex on legs. If I hadn't known any better I swear they could have been painted on. Adjusting my tits in the black bra I snapped my fingers at Jasper who was currently sitting on my shirt, probably wrinkling it with his ass.

Before I could tell him what I wanted, he threw my shirt at me, making it land on my head. "Will you quit it!" I hissed, snatching the top from my head and slipping it on.

"Quit what?" He asked a little amused at my behaviour.

"You know - the whole lurking _thing _you're doing." I glared. I knew what he was doing. He did it every time we were about to hit the clubs. He wanted to have the big brother talk with me which consisted of the same shit every time. Don't get too drunk, don't go home with strangers, if you want to go home with some one - I want their drivers licence number and their mother's name as well as their social and the name of their first pet. Rolling my eyes at his innocent puppy dog eyes, he began laughing and shaking his head at me.

"You know me too well" He smiled.

"Of course I do" I smirked, bunching my hair up high and tying it with a band. I still had most of the make up on from earlier so I just patted some gloss on and let it be. "You are after all, my other half"

"Yeah - the better half. Now let's get this show on the road." He clapped standing and snatched my hand in his and all but dragged me out the bedroom door.

"So where exactly are we going?" I asked wondering what the boys had been planning all day. It had taken them an hour to decide what time to leave so the chance of having something actually planned was pretty slim.

"Well Emmett seems to know what he's doing, so I have placed our lives in his hands for this evening." As soon as he'd mentioned Rosalie's husbands name and our lives I wasn't exactly thrilled. I'd meet him earlier and his was like the American version of Arnold Schwarzenegger with the flirting capabilities of Colin Farrell. It was like he was a walking hard-on. Such a shame he was wasting it all on his wife. He was like a big, brawny kid, ready to pounce on the nearest thrill and strangle it with his bare hands while making us all suffer. His idea of fun would have consisted on beer, ball - preferably basketball - and bungee jumping. I was not safe at all in Emmett's hands.

Walking into the kitchen, Jasper grabbed two beers before leading me out to the front porch. It didn't take long before Emmett and Edward joined us. Emmett was dressed in a red button down shirt and black slacks while Edward wore light grey jeans and a white shirt. Edward obviously didn't know the rule we had about white shirts. White shirts meant wet t-shirt contest - even if it did consist of half a pint of beer over it. People had learned the hard way by partying with me and Jasper. We couldn't blame them. We'd be pissed too.

"Alright!" Emmett bellowed fist pumping the air. "My angel's asleep and the wife is about ready to head to bed. You boys ready to have the best damn time of your lives?"

"Oh hell no" I said shaking my head and looking pleadingly at Jasper. All I wanted to do was crawl up, back into the room and hit the hay for the night.

"Oh come on Lee, it'll be fun. You just wait and see" Emmett chuckled, wrapping an arm around my neck and pulling me toward to car. "Let Emmy take care of you"

"Hey you big Sasquatch motherfucker. No man handling me" I snapped, trying to wriggle free.

"Come on Leah, you promised you'd be good" Jasper said ushering me into the car before shutting the door. Not that I had a choice right?

I sat in the back with my arms crossed against my chest as Jasper hoped into the front seat with Emmett and Edward rode in the back with me. Even though we were at opposite end of the seat, it felt as if Edward was sitting right next to me and breathing down my neck, his personal perfume once again surrounding me and I felt a little light headed. Tucking the beer between my thighs I pulled down the buckle and snapped myself in. Turning to look at Edward I frowned when I didn't notice him wearing a seatbelt. Without saying a word I lent across and pulled his buckle down to snap him in also. "You forgot to buckle up" I whispered as I pulled away.

"I don't normally" He said with a frown as he looked toward me, or even past me.

"Well you have to when I am in the car" I said quietly, before sipping on my beer again. The air seemed thick as I let out a breath before Jasper spoke on my behalf.

"Leah's older brother died in a car accident. He wasn't wearing a belt"

And just like that Jasper and even Emmett pulled their belts down. I wanted to punch Jasper in the eye for telling these 'strangers' something so personal, but I knew most people would have only shrugged it off if I was to say anything else. Giving Jasper and small smile I sat back in the leather of the car seat and let the hum of the car over take me.

* * *

Club Black was mad as hell. Especially after four beers, three vodka chasers and two cock sucking cowboys. The music was changed up every now and then, alternating from the hard core techno beat to bump and grind RnB. Slipping back into the booth I grinned at Jasper. The music was so loud I literally had to scream across the table to get his attention.

"Assper!" I yelled watching as he frowned. He'd always hated the stripper name I gave him but I thought it suited him quite appropriately. Him _and _his cute butt.

"What Whorewater?" And just like that, he'd turned the tables.

_Asshole_.

For my own amusement I scratched my forehead with my middle finger and raised an eyebrow as he dipped his finger tips into his gin and tonic before flicking tiny drops of the drink at me. Oh it was on! _Like Donkey Kong bitches._

Swirling my said finger in my tequila shot, I sucked it down my throat before glancing at Emmett who let out a disgruntled groan. "Please stop" He whined, using his hand to readjusted his jeans under the table. "You're reminding me of Rosey"

_Eww_! I screeched in my mind, disgusted that he'd just compared me to that Martha Stewart Medusa he'd left at home.

"Now now Emmett" Jasper tisked. "We all know Lee is way better than my sister"

"She wishes" He laughed making my hand grip my drink like a homeless guy being asked for a sip of his paper bag covered vodka.

Turning to Edward who had been fairly quiet all night, I batted my eyelashes. "Do you think I am hot Eddie?"

Emmett raised his eye brow at me and shook his head, laughing like he'd gone mental. "Of course he thinks you're hot. You're the first woman he's spent more than 5 minutes around." Raising an eyebrow of my own, I couldn't help but feel bad for Edward. His head was down and looking away from me like I was naked or something. I knew that those cheeks had lit up again and I slung an arm around his shoulders, glaring at Emmett.

"Hey, that's not very nice" I scolded, scooting a little closer to the guy that was turning into a human tomato. I could feel Edwards back and arms tense up at the closeness between us and I wanted to giggle at his uneasiness. My inability to make wise decision's had already left me and I gently ran the tips of my fingers over his neck, brushing them through the small nape of hair there. It was surprisingly soft and I had a major urge it smell him and run my nose against his neck to see if the strange perfume was coming from him. Hearing him suck in a quiet breath made me a little too excited and I scooted closer once again.

I could admit that I was probably being a total sleaze but I couldn't help it. Brady's annoying voice was still resounding inside my brain and the cure to get rid of one man is to find another. Plus - it wasn't like I was ever going to see him again after this weekend. Me and Jasper would go back to New York, I'd go on pretending I was happy and Jasper would probably marry his pretty midget. I wanted to have fun and I wanted to have fun now.

"Leah don't" Jasper sighed, grabbing my forearm and stopping me from touching Edward with my other hand. Turning, I was surprised to see my blonde bombshell friend watching me with worried eyes. Surely he knew I was just messing around, but maybe it was all too close for comfort? Maybe he thought I would fuck up his whole perfect relationship with his sister and her family.

"No no. I wanna see this" Emmett grinned taking a big happy slurp of his imported beer.

Focusing my attention back on Edward I rested my chin on his shoulder waiting for him to speak. He'd been a fly on the wall all night and it wasn't the usual male behaviour I was used to. The men I knew were loud, brash, insanely over confident and just plain over bearing. But not Edward. He was quiet, shy and very timid. Maybe he was just hiding from me? Maybe it was a case of him being secretive and he was really some big CIA spy who used his brother and his family as a cover.

Either way... I was over all the maybe's. I wanted a damn answer.

Reaching over I placed my hand on his thigh and squeezed with enough pressure for him to understand I was still waiting to be answered. "Well?" I grinned, pressing my chin a little harder into his shoulder and cocking my head. "What do you think Edward?"

"I can't _see _you" He breathed out clutching the edge of the table.

"That's cause you're not looking at me" I mused as my nails scratched around the collar of his shirt lightly making him shudder under my touch. I was drowning in everything - namely alcohol - and most importantly Edward. While Brady and me had only been fucking for three months, the spark had long died. We would fuck without the cuddling, without the whispers. I had basically become a businessman's whore. He took me out to dinner, dressed me in dresses that revealed more skin than a bikini, introduced me to all his friends and even left money on my dresser. When I would ask him to do anything else he would shake me off and go back to reading his paper, or checking his blackberry like I was an inconvenience.

Every time I touched him, he didn't shudder or pant but merely stared at me silently asking what I was doing with his eyes. He hadn't liked me playing with his hair or being overly intimate in any way. Ouch. Thinking about that ass face fucker made me hurt a little in my chest. Fuck, I hadn't been in love with him or anything, but being treated like an animal rather than an equal was hurtful and could make someone feel worthless.

Watching Edwards adam's apple bob nervously in his throat, I squeezed his leg again, this time though a little higher to make sure I wouldn't be ignored. Before I had time to speak again Edward pushed my hands away from him.

"I can't do this. I'm sorry" He explained hurriedly before darting away from the table, knocking both his drink and a group of people over as he disappeared into the crowd.

"Fuck" I mumbled, lazily grabbing the dis-guarded tissues from the table and wiping them across my top. He just had to go and knock the drink straight into me.

"Damn, he's upset" Emmett grumbled, shifting out of the booth and smiling at me. "You owe me a drink for this too. Now I have to get all emo and comfort him. Just when I was having to good time too"

"Shut up!" I snapped still dragging the tissue across my clothing. Now I smelt like a fucking two dollar, rummed-up hooker.

"You deserved that" Jasper shrugged, throwing a couple of twenty's down on the table to cover our drinks.

"Right" I snarked, rolling my eyes. "I deserve to have his drink all over me. Oh for fuck's sake. My jeans are wet too" I whined, staring down at the wet patch near my thigh. My evil jeans had been massacred.

Cocking his head to the side Jasper smiled. "I don't think you're wet from the drink Lee baby" Damn, I'd left that one wide open.

"I don't know what you're talking about" The tone in my voice was dark and I knew I was about to have one of my famous outbursts.

"Sure you don't. What happened to Brady? I thought you and him were actually dating or something? Now you're into Edward?"

"I'm not _into _Edward" I grimaced, my nose twitching remembering that strange scent.

"You like him - I can tell. You should be honest with Brady. Or Edward. Or even yourself. But you shouldn't string either along."

"Maybe if you paid any attention to me today, you would have known that me and Brady are over." I sulked, throwing the wet scrunched up tissues down onto the table.

"I'm sorry about Brady of course, but I'm glad that you're not seeing him anymore. You're too good for him." He replied, seriously patting my hand.

"Right. That and the fact you both hate each other, of course, has nothing to do with it" I mused, rolling my eyes and tightening the band in my hair.

Taking another sip of his beer, he looked at me strangely like he was thinking hard about something. "What are you doing tomorrow?" The question was strange and I could only reply with a shrug. I didn't know anyone in this town so it wasn't like I could actually make plans or anything.

"Why?"

"I want you to help me pick out a ring" His face was serious and all I could do was frown.

"For what?" As soon as I said the words, it dawned on me like the sun rising for the first time, or in my case, a grand piano dropping on my head from three storeys up. "You're asking her to - MARRY YOU?" I shrieked, bursting from my seat and balling my fists to my side. This was not good. Not good at all.

"Of course. Surely you _knew _this was coming. You know I love her Leah" He said, concern running over his precious features.

"But marriage? MARRIAGE?" I was so far lost in my own thoughts the only thing I wanted to do was kick and scream until someone restrained me in a straight jacket and dragged me away. I was hurt, more than hurt. Here I was telling him how I'd broken up with Brady and he tells me his going to marry Alice? That he's going to run into the sunset with his midget wife and leave me all alone? Well fuck that and fuck him!

"I love her and I was _hoping _you'd be happy for me." Jasper replied, his eyes down cast on his drink.

"Yeah, can't you tell-" I replied flatly. "- I'm fucking _ecstatic_" I sniped. "Have a nice life" Pushing my way from the booth I moved away from my best friend hurriedly, ignoring the hurt look on his face.

* * *

I couldn't believe this was happening, it was all so fucked up. Jasper was going to leave me, he was going to start a life with that little kid looking thing and leave me. I couldn't afford the apartment we lived in on my own and there was no way in hell I was going to live there with a newly married couple. I could handle someone being happy, I just couldn't handle being constantly surrounded by it - drowning in it.

This was not the way this weekend was supposed to turn out. I was supposed to have fun with my _best _friend. We were supposed to use this time to get shit faced with his brother in law at night, and during the day he would spend time with his sister and I would sleep off all the alcohol. We were supposed to bond again after being rimmed to the floor from our jobs, our responsibilities - all that real life bullshit. However - marriage - was about as real as it got.

"Hey lady, were here" The cab driver that smelt like old spice and burgers said, as the cab idled in the driveway of the mansion. Groaning, I dug out a couple of twenty's from my pocket and passed it to him through the glass window seperating the front and back.

"Keep the change" I mumbled, getting out of the cab.

Watching the cab drive back out of the long dark driveway made me want to cry. Where was it going? Why was it leaving me all alone with a blonde bitch and her freaky smart kid. Rubbing my hands over my face I tried to snap myself out of 'meltdown' mode and back into 'escape' mode. My master plan of escape would result in one of two things. A - Jasper would never speak to me again or B - Jasper would never speak to me again and be crazy pissed. But whatever right? As long as he got the perfect life, with the picket fence and the babies... oh the babies... the wonderful tiny children that would run around him, the children he would scoop up and kiss, the children who would jump up and down in his and Alice's bed on Christmas morning.

"Great. Now I am just fucking pathetic" I hissed as I angrily wiped away the tears that were falling down my cheeks.

"Hello Leah" A voice murmured, making me almost tumble down the front steps as I climbed them towards the door. Snapping my head left, there was Edward, in all his shy glory. He was perched in a comfortable looking rocking sofa, its white and light blue stripes making it look like homely and warm.

"You know Emmett's looking for you?" I said, walking over and leaning back on to the porch railing as he lightly rocked himself.

"I figured as much" He replied with a small smile. The porch was dark but the light of the dim lit moon shone over him nicely. His white shirt had a slight glow under the rays, making him dully illuminate.

"I'm sorry" We both replied at the same time, before smiling and chuckling.

"You mind if I sit?" I asked feeling my heels begin to pinch my toes. I needed to sit badly but I wanted him to be okay with me taking a seat next to him, after all, I had kind of been a jerk at the club.

"Not at all" He said smoothly.

I was guessing he was quite surprised when I sat next to him after I'd kicked my heels off, even though I had pointed to the area when I asked. His back was tense again, though not as much anymore. I wasn't breathing down his neck and tried to stay as far away as I could from him. The wind picked up a little and there were nearby sounds of small creatures but not much else. The air out here was so much fresher than back in New York and I couldn't help but breathe it in deeply before exhaling again.

"It's nice isn't it?" Edward said placing his hands on his thighs. He looked like he had nice hands, big yet still girly enough to feel amazing against a woman's skin. His fingers were long and just looking at them I could feel I slight buzz in between my legs. The alcohol had really done a number on me. Not only was I stupid as fuck, now I was horny as a sailor.

"Yeah" I coughed a little to clear my thoughts. "It's different. Nice but still different"

"If you don't mind me asking, how long have you been in New York? Were you born there?"

"Nah. My dad moved there when I was ten years old. I was actually born near Seattle, in a small, off the maps kinda town. I basically spent every holiday in New York with my father and when school would start I'd go back to my mother's house. Have you been?"

"I never had the chance really. I don't travel much" He shrugged as he splayed his fingers over his denim clad legs. "Can you - can you describe it to me?" His voice was unsure again, back to the shy Edward I'd met.

"New York?" When he nodded I had to think hard about describing the city to someone who had never seen it before. "There are lights as far as the eye can see. Colours everywhere. They say it's the city that never sleeps. After living there for as many years as I have, it starts to become - I don't know - old. Don't get me wrong, I loved that city down to my very core, it just - people there - they walk too fast, eat too fast and have relationship like they're going out of fashion. Being there feels like everything is moving so fast you can't keep up. It's like living on speed."

"And here?" He asked smoothly, his teeth gleaming as he bit down on his bottom lip.

"And here - It's just fresh, you know. Slow." Sighing I tilted my head back and closed my eyes.

"I never got to answer your question" He all but whispered.

Opening my eyes my breath hitched and caught in my throat at the distance he'd covered in mere seconds. I could feel his hand lightly touch my forearm and I just about came in my jeans. "What - what are you-"

"You wanted an answer, didn't you?" He mused, placing his hand around my wrist and pressing his fingers gently into my skin. Before I could reply his other hand came up to my shoulder and his fingertips lightly brushed my collar bone. His hands felt like they were leaving tiny little trails of lust all over my body. My heart rate was increasing and my eyes started to flutter and the skin of his palm slowly worked it's way up my neck. Jesus, he was magical, he was a fucking master. Watching his hand curl a little, he stroked my cheek with the back of his hand before running it through the hair over my ear.

"Your skin is so soft" He groaned as he ran his thumb over the shell of my ear, tracing it's shape. "Your ears are small but beautiful" He breathed, making his hot breath wash over me like a drug.

Laying his index finger over my ear, his thumb ran against my chin and I wanted nothing more than to angle my mouth down and suck it between my lips.

Shifting closer, I whimpered as his thumb pressed the underside of my jaw up, making me tilt my head back, while he ran his nose so damn close to my neck. "You smell like water lilies and raspberries" He murmured as his mouth lifted to near my ear. "Even though I can't see you, I know your exquisite. Devine."

Looking back at him I noticed his eyes were closed as he pulled away from me. His breathing matched my own and it felt like my chest was going to explode. Not even when Brady and I had gotten together, did he _ever _touch me like _that_. He couldn't leave invisible fire on my skin, he couldn't make my heart jump at his touch nor my underwear soak by just the feel of his skin on mine.

It wasn't even a case of whether I was sober or not. I wanted Edward and I wanted him now.

Before he could pull back any further I quickly pulled his hand back to my face and lay my own over his cheek. Before he could ask me what I was doing, I kissed him. I kissed him like I'd never kissed anyone before. It was hard and wanting because there was no doubt in my fucked up head that I wanted him. And I wanted it bad.

* * *

AN - I really wanted to be evil and keep this chapter from y'all for a little while but I couldn't. It's impossible! Me and my ADHD can't contain the excitement anymore! We needed to post this chapter! LMFAO. Thank you for all the wonderful reviews. My WILF girls are not impressed with me betraying our Alpha, so I do hope you are enjoying! I WILL be punished!


	4. Chapter 4

******I do not own Twilight**

* * *

[ Chapter Four ]

I was dead. I was sure of it. Because not much else in my life could compare to the blissful heaven I was in.

Her lips were soft like a butterflies wings though forceful like a hurricane against my own. The seams of our lips were sewn together in a burst of heat and wetness, like a burst of a divine rose petal being rolled around softly against one's fingertips . Her tongue was all but shoved down my throat as she tasted me, licking and nibbling everything that wonderful organ could get to. She was savage, wanting, a lioness wanting nothing more than to sink her animalistic claws into my throat and tear away my flesh. The hand that had been lying on my face, caressing me, had magically moved to my hair and she was pulling down frantically, ranking her nails through it and against my scalp. I'd never felt something so good before, so invigorating. Every nerve ending in my body had ceased to make sense and all I could think of was her.

My mind was aghast with the way I could taste her so intimately on my tongue. That raspberry taste was soaking into me, into my skin, my - everything, making believe that she had some kind of secret gloss on those lips, lips that only I could feel. Lips that were driving me crazy.

I hated that I couldn't survive on the taste alone and had to push her back a little to catch my breath. I wanted more than anything for her to melt into me, become one with my hands, so I could never feel her far from me again. My body was so excited and I didn't want to scare her off so I would have to slow things down. Be more - graceful.

Feeling the bulge in my jeans rise, I was already much too excited for my own good and I was afraid that if she touched me again I would end up - ___finishing_ - before we even started. Of course I'd had practice - even if it was with my own hands in the darkness of the night while the rest of the house slept - but the softness of her hands, her skin, her scent combined, I knew with everything I believed in, I would not last more than ten seconds.

Not that I was presuming she would just - ___sleep _with me or anything.

I'd kissed a woman before, but never had I ___kissed_ a woman. Not a woman like Leah. Not one so interested in ripping my clothes off and having her way with me. Would it have been wrong if I wanted such things, such an experience? This was the first time since my college days that I had been so close to be able to feel the heat of a woman's body near mine. Of course Rosalie was discounted having married my brother, but still, I could ___feel_ that she was hotter than my sister in law.

She was hot, scolding like accidentally touching the hot plate of an oven and I wasn't sure if it was the alcohol coursing through her blood or from excitement from the moments between us.

I knew about sex, I just didn't have a first hand experience per say.

Her light panting breaths were rolling against the skin of my neck, her mouth refusing to stop kissing any part of me, making he feel wanted for the first time in a long time. With her lips were pressing up against my pulse point, I couldn't help but groan as her tongue flicked out and she tasted my skin. I wanted to tell her it was okay, that she could have me any way she wanted. I wondered how I tasted to her but when her teeth nipped at my my adam's apple I immediately went blank, like a plane slipping off a sonar detector. I was lost. Drowning at sea, drowning in Leah.

Her tongue was the devil and I wanted it all over me.

Her hands were busily making their way to my shoulders, scrunching the material and fisting it to pull me forward, making me almost lose balance completely. But now instead of just having to press my legs together to hide the erection in my jeans, she was now pressed up against it, sitting and rubbing against me.

She had used me for leverage to straddle me like one would to saddle a horse and I felt like the luckiest son of a bitch on the planet.

Her legs were draped over my lap and I was so afraid of touching her inappropriately, my hands lingered in the air a moment trying to think of places to put them, other than her behind. Oh how I wanted to touch her, run my fingertips along her skin and discover every plane and crease, every dip her body made.

Another embarrassing groan escaped my lips as she pressed her chest into mine and clawed at the hem of my shirt to allow her nails to drag up the skin of my sides, catching in some parts and scratching me.

I could feel the erectness of her nipples scrape across my chest. My senses were so heightened they felt like glass, pressing and cutting into me. She was driving me insane with the jerking movements she was making against me, and I thought hard and fast trying to distract myself from what her body was doing to mine. I tried to think of horrible things; the way certain foods taste on my pallet, the way certain textures felt against my skin, but each connection the zip of her jeans made with mine, threw me straight back into thoughts of her.

My stomach muscles contracted hard under her hands making a tiny little giggle escape those wonderful lips. She sounded like a child at a candy store and I just happened to be a life size lollipop. I tried to shake the image of a lollipops hardness slipping into her sweet mouth. It was too much.

"Like that huh?" She whispered confidently, kissing along the underside of my jaw and nibbling softly as her hands moved to play with my trail of hair under my belly button and then continuing south of the border.

Far south - South Pole, ___south_.

The clearing of someone's throat made Leah groan into my throat and drop her head into the crook of my neck as she pulled the front of my shirt in frustration. I could feel her pain indefinitely. She'd almost been there, so close to touching me, stroking me in her warm soft hands. Those hands that I needed back under my shirt.

Finally laying my hands on her lower back I huffed out a sigh of my own disappointment. I suppose with the sudden events and the woman perched atop of me I had forgotten about my cousin Embry who had given me a ride home. Even if I would have liked to forget him more than ever at the time.

It was lucky he'd been at the club and seen me moving through the dance floor. He'd managed to catch up with me so quickly I was sure I hadn't even made it half way through the crowd. I can admit - I panicked. Having Leah so close, her whispering, her hands - it was all too much. I didn't want her to see me cum in my pants in the booth. Had we been alone, things might have been different, but with my brother and Jasper sitting there also, I wanted to keep some of the dignity with the guys.

From the day she'd arrived and helped me with my wardrobe malfunction, I was intrigued. She was like fire. Her tongue sharp and her wits on par with any person that dared challenge her. She wasn't soft spoken like the friends Rosalie brought to the house to dine on tea and refreshments and she actually said what she was thinking instead of pussy footing around subjects.

I guess that wasn't the only reason though.

It still hadn't clicked with her that I couldn't see. That the use of visual simulation was pointless for me. She hadn't seen my disability and treated me like everyone else. Like I was a person - a man - and not a boy. If Rosalie would have caught her giving me the horrid drink she kept in crystal, Leah would have been drop kicked and sent packing. Rosalie was like my mother. And not even if I wanted to could I escape her watchful eye.

I'd heard her and Emmett talking in the kitchen and it was safe to say that she did not see eye to eye with Leah. She'd used words like 'bitch', 'disrespectful' and 'home wrecker' in the long winded rant she gave my poor brother. I myself could not concur with her judgements. Leah amused me, she was actually quite funny when she wasn't sniping, and I felt jealously crawling into my belly when she'd spend time with Jasper. Flirting, fighting and I prayed and hoped -___not _- fornicating.

Even Emmett, my not so intelligent brother had noticed the strange relationship the two had, and that was saying something.

"Well well Edward. I see you were holding out on me. You were just in a hurry to get out of the club because you had a she-devil wanting for you at home" Embry's chuckle sounded in my ear, the distance of his voice only meters away from the porch swing. "You're a dog Cullen" He tisked, no doubt smirking. "A dirty rotten dog"

He'd been on a buck's night with one of his 'tribal' brothers as he liked to call them. He was one of the strangest people I had ever met and yet he was passionately loyal and willing to do anything for family. He didn't hold back on anything he was thinking, and he often didn't think before he spoke. I guess it ran in the family as both Emmett and I didn't know when to shut up sometimes. For me, only people I knew ever got to see that side.

Embry was often left out of family gatherings much like me. We were both at a 'disadvantage' as I liked to refer to it. With my lack of sight and ___his colouring_, the rest of the extended family liked to stay far, far away from us. He'd often tell me that there was nothing wrong with us and it was 'those assholes' with the problems. After a while we just kinda got each other. He was probably just as close to me as my brother was.

One thing about Embry was that with him, I was just his cousin. Nothing else. Not the blind guy. Not the dude with a disability. Just another guy.

"Make him go away" Leah whined into my shoulder, her deep breaths concentrating in one spot making it feel like my shoulder was on fire. I had to do something. I had to get rid of him. I ___needed _this - if not for the huge hard on in my pants then for my sanity.

* * *

"Make him go away" I whined like a baby into Edwards shoulder. I was so hot I was practically ready to shove his hands down my jeans just so he could finish me off. I hadn't ever been as horny as I was at that very moment. I knew it wasn't the alcohol doing Edward's body the justice it deserved. He was lean, sculpted and my fingers wanted nothing more than to explore him all over.

I could feel the guys eyes on us, yet I still wanted to grind myself in to the nice bulge of Edward's jeans.

___God_! My jeans rock, and if by some magic awesomeness I could get them off with out looking like a complete moron, I would be eternally thankful. ___Amen_!

These jeans deserved to be framed and worshipped. They were still king.

"Embry man - I'll call you tomorrow?" That's it Edward, tell the Embry guy to fuck off so we can get to it. And of course by 'get to it' I meant fucking like jack rabbits. I had to bite my bottom lip as an image of Edward taking me from behind popped into my head. Me over the edge of something - anything - while he drove me back into last week. I couldn't help but shudder at the image.

Like I said, me and alcohol - not cool. I felt like a barbarian, some kind of Amazon woman, demanding snoo-snoo and beating my club into the ground if I didn't get it.

"Aww come on man - you're not even going to introduce me to your girl" The guy pouted making me finally look over at him and glare. Okay weird. This was Edward's friend? The tall lanky native guy that had longer hair than I did? Was he holding a damn blender? Hey - at least I liked his high tops. Scratch that - he was still in my shit books. Interrupting our heated make out session made this Embry fellow shoot straight to the arch enemy list.

"Fine. Embry this is Leah. Leah, my cousin Embry. Ok then, bye now" I laughed at how fast Edward spoke, at least it was nice to hear that he was wanting this just as much as I did.

___Wait _- cousin?

"Huh?" I questioned looking back and forth in between the two guys. "Are you serious?" I couldn't help but frown. This was some kind of joke right. They didn't even look the same, not one ounce of similarity flowed between them. They were definitely jerking my chain.

"Yeah" Embry smiled, leaning his shoulder against the outside of the house, looking over me like I was naked. Maybe I could just let him watch? I mean, what was the harm in a little voyeurism?

No. No. Bad Leah. We are not going to prison again.

"The family resemblance astounds me" I commented rolling my eyes at the pair. I'd believed some stupid shit in the past but this was kind of absurd.

"Really?" Edward asked.

No. Not really - ass hat. Seriously, sarcasm was not Edward's cup of tea. I could probably say I was a duck and he would have believed me. His innocence just made him hotter, and any hotter he would've turned into molten lava.

"No" I said disbelievingly. ___Urgh_! This was so shit! I needed less talking and more lips. Namely Edward's. Fuck they were nice, nicer than any other stupid asshole's I'd felt in a while. I needed to have them again. ___Now_.

"Right well, were going to fuck now, so Edward will call you okay? He promises to give you all the juicy details later, blah blah blah. You know the drill - man code and all that."

Edward almost turned purple at my comment and Embry just stood blinking at me like I was crazy person hanging from a chandelier. Well, what the fuck did they expect? Pushing myself off Edward, I tugged at his hand for him to stand and follow me.

"What the hell is going on out here" A sleepy yet pissed off voice asked.

I was dead. I was so dead. In a flash Rosalie stepped out of the door and looked over the porch to find us all standing there like morons in the dark. It was like the two guys were invisible and her glare just honed in on me. Why did my life suck? Oh that's right - Because I was a horny bitch that needed to get laid. Because I swore like a sailor and because I drank out of the milk carton from the fridge. My mother told me countless times I was going to hell for the milk thing but I didn't believe her - not until now that is.

Rosalie stood in all her glory, her white satin slip making me scoff a little at how perfect she even looked when she'd just woken up. I kind of looked like a homeless person when I woke up, but not her. Her perfect cascading golden locks sat perfectly on her shoulder's, her face was clear of make up but she was still so pretty. ___Hate her_.

Before I could let go of Edward's hand her eyes narrowed further to the space between us. I could see the vein in her neck almost pop through her creamy skin as she stared and stared. Now that she was looking at our hands, I couldn't even pull it away. I was frozen. I was fucking frozen and I wanted to slap myself. I could just imagine the news head lines in tomorrows paper. 'Crazy blonde bitch kills horny devil'.

Clearing my throat my eyes darted to our intertwined hands and I knew I had to distract her somehow.

"Hi Rosalie - we were just-" I didn't even get to finish before she cut me off.

"Edward-" She hissed making my spine crawl. "What is ___this_?" If I thought I could get angry, I hadn't seen anything. I was just a Care Bear compared to Rosalie, who all but busted a nut in her head. Her cheeks were flushed and it looked as though she was about to have a major heart attack.

Taking a step back I instinctively angled my body in front of Edward's, knowing that if she lunged he would be hurt. I may have been crazy but even with the little time with Edward I knew there was no way in hell he would be able to fight off a fly. He was just too sweet – exactly how he tasted.

"You better answer me right now Edward!" She hollered making me wince. What was she? His mother? I couldn't believe she was acting like this. He wasn't a little kid, he was a full grown man. A man who I happened to think was sexy. And no one messes with ___my _sexiness.

"I think you should back off!" I snapped giving her my deepest glare. Poor Edward was almost hyperventilating behind me. I bet no one ever yelled at him before, he was just too nice. His hot breath against my neck was some what distracting me but I held true.

"Leah, please don't" Edward whispered in my ear as he placed a hand on my hip trying to ease me back into him. I really hoped he wouldn't ease me back into that bulge, my panties were only just starting to dry.

"What the hell?" Jasper bellowed as both he and Emmett bounded up the steps. Taking a glance over at the driveway I was surprised to see that Emmett's big car sat in the drive, in all it's black glory.

Jasper's eyes shot between his sister and me, asking us silently what was going on. By this time, Embry had backed away, holding his blender like it was going to save him or something. I should have beat him with it when I had the chance. Pussy.

"What's going on?" Jasper asked forcefully, looking at me and waiting for an answer. I was gob smacked and hurt. He actually thought I started this? So much for best friends. I was going to apologise after my outburst but now - now I wasn't so sure.

"What's going on is your 'whore' here is trying to seduce Edward." Rosalie bit out making me sound like some kind of scum beneath her shoes. I was so sick of people calling me a whore, it wasn't like I purposely made myself like that. It just happened sometimes.

"What?" Jasper replied cocking his head to the side, like she'd spoken fucking Thai.

"Fuck you bitch" I growled. "I suggest you stop bleaching your fucking hair. All the crazy is going to your brain." Oops, that hadn't meant to come out.

It was lucky Jasper was as fast as he was, because in an instant Rosalie launched at me, her hands stretched out ready to claw my eyes out. Her red painted nails gleamed in the moonlight, looking like she'd already taken a swipe at me and drawn blood with her cat like nails.

"I got your crazy right here. I'm going to kill you - you fucking ___cunt_!" She stuttered. Ohh - she stole my word. Hate her. ___More_.

"You know what-"

"Leah - shut the fuck up!" Jasper commanded making me shrink back immediately and back into Edward.

Silence. Complete silence engulfed the air and my breath stopped in my throat. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't get a single drop of oxygen into my lungs. Had he just told me to shut up in a non playful, non lovable way? My eyes quivered and I had to seal my lips together to stop from blubbering. He was definitely not getting his apology now.

He could see the hurt on my face but had his hands full trying to stop his sister from killing me.

"Edward you listen and you listen good. She just feels sorry for you. She feels sorry for you because your blind. Don't fall for her home wrecking ass"

I snorted at her and flipped her the bird. "Ah no. Edward didn't even drink that much at the club" I answered referring to the blindness remark. If anyone was blink drunk it was me.

"You see Jasper" She screamed, trying to strangle him with his collar. "She just a dumb bitch. She can't even see it."

"Rose ___please _don't" Edward pleaded with the raging lunatic. What were these crazys talking about? She must have seen the confusion in my face making her speak again.

"He's ___blind_ Leah. He can't even ___see _you. He hasn't seen a single thing since he was six years old." She snapped pushing Jasper away and straightening out her slip. It took Jasper a few steps to regain his balance and just like that the silence was back.

I still didn't fully understand. I'd seen Edward walking around the house without any kind of an aid. Maybe he was just colour blind. He could totally see, right? Of course he could. Yeah.

"Leah-" His velvety voice whispered from behind me and I had to take an extra long breathe before I turned to him.

"She'd kidding right. You can see me right?" I asked waiving my hands in front of his face. Not once did his eyes move to follow my hands and it suddenly felt like someone had pulled the ground out beneath me. My eyes fluttered and my head felt heavy. "Edward - you can see me right?" I was losing it fast. I was choking on my own words.

"Leah I-"

"You can see me. You're just fucking with me right? I mean, your all just messing with me right?" I was terrified of what was slipping out of my mouth, but the verbal onslaught didn't stop. "You can see me can't you?" I dropped my voice low, cupping his face between my hands and whimpering. I didn't know what I was doing. "I'm here. Right in front of you. What colour are my eyes?" I asked wanting him to answer me and give me a radiant smile.

"Does it matter what colour your eyes are? They're beautiful either way"

That was his answer? Growling I pressed his cheeks forcefully down with my thumbs, holding him in place so he couldn't shy away. "Edward - tell me. What. colour. are. my. ___eyes_?"

Please say brown, chestnut, fucking black for all I cared. Please tell me it isn't so.

"Blue?"

And just like that the dizziness took me and I felt the bile rising in my throat. Blue? Seriously Blue? Out of all the eye colours he picks blue? Closing my eyes tightly I could feel the thrum of my heart in my temple. What the fuck have I done?

"Leah, please don't think of me any different" He pleaded, his hands gripping my elbows, attempting to keep me in front of him. I couldn't look at him, not without feeling sick. Without feeling horrible.

How did I not notice? How could I be so ___fucking_stupid. There were signs everywhere, but I'd refused to believe them. And now I was standing here in front of all these people, like I was ten years old again, on stage and attempting to spell out 'psychosis' at the National Spelling Bee and failing miserably.

"Why the fuck didn't you tell me?" I asked softly, backing away from him. His face was hurt and I realised that he shouldn't ___have had _to tell me. It should have been obvious.

"I just - I wanted a chance - to get to know you - without the prejudice of you knowing about it. I wanted you to-"

"What? You wanted me to fuck you before you told me? You wanted to play with my head?"

Jasper stepped forward in Edward's defence. How honourable. "Leah stop, you know this isn't going to solve anything"

"Oh - here comes big bad Jasper to make it okay" As I spoke he tried to reach for me and I merely slapped his hands away. "Don't you touch me. We are ___not _friends anymore."

"Come off it Leah. Is this about the ring? Shit, if you want me to be lonely all my life then why don't you just say it? You want me to be like ___you_, then fine - I won't marry Alice"

Without thinking I rose my hand and slapped him hard across the face. The sound echoed in everyone's ears, small gasps coming from a few of the people that stood on the porch.

Reaching up, Jasper touched his jaw disbelievingly.

"I can't believe you just said that to me" My voice stuttered as I tried to blink away the tears. "So that's what you really think of me? That I am going to be an old maid? Alone for the rest of my life?"

"You know that's not what I God damn meant" He snapped, rubbing his jawline. "Why do you always twist things around to make it sound like your the victim?"

"Hey man, back up" Emmett growled, warning Jasper to keep away from me.

"No. Let him talk. Let's all get it out in the open while we can right? What else Jasper, keep going - what else!"

"You both need to calm down. Screaming at each other isn't going to solve anything." Emmett said forcefully, glaring at the both of us to stop our shenanigans. "We all have unresolved shit in our lives but fighting about it drunk isn't going to help any"

It took a moment for our breathing to come back down to earth and for my fists to unclench "You're right." Jasper said softly, his eyes downcast toward the porch. My guess was that he felt guilty.

"I don't want ___her _in my house" Rosalie ebbed, snatching Emmett towards her like I had the bubonic plague. It wasn't like I even wanted to stay in her big beautiful house anyway.

Edward gripped the side of my hip making me realise he'd still not let go. I looked up at him as he cleared his throat and ran a hand through all that bronze hair. "Embry, would it be okay if ___we _stayed at your place for the night?"

I could see Rosalie's jaw just about drop to the floor with Edward's request.

Nodding his head uncomfortably Embry replied. "Sure man. The spare rooms a little beat up but it should be okay."

"You're going with ___her_?" Rosalie outright spat, making Edward shuffle a little but still nod his head. "You can't do that Edward. It's not right" She pleaded, sounding extremely annoying.

"I'm not doing anything wrong Rose. Perhaps Leah and I will be able to talk without the audience." His hand caressed my hip lightly and I felt the goose bumps rise under my jeans.

"If that's okay with you?" He whispered, so close to my ear I could feel his lips curve with every syllable. He was going to be the death of me.

"Fine" I nodded as a little smirk played on my lips. If it was going to piss of the blonde Barbie, I was in.

"Leah – will you call me in the morning?" Jasper asked softly as I walked past him, with Edward's hand pressing into the small of my back. I wanted to nod, say yes, cry and tell him how sorry I was, but I was still so pissed off.

Not saying anything, I let Edward lead me down the porch steps.

"Shouldn't I be doing this for you?" I whispered urgently, watching as his feet placed themselves in front of each other perfectly.

"No Leah. I can navigate this whole property - even with my eyes closed." He grinned, extremely happy with his own little joke.

Huffing I glanced over my shoulder, noticing Rosalie's glare, Emmett's look of concern and Jasper's hurt filled face.

Maybe me and Jasper were finally coming to that part in our lives. That being friends forever was just a stupid kids idea. No one was friends forever. No one ever came out of high school and had all those people at their wedding and then subsequently at their funeral. Maybe we'd always been ___too _close. Maybe what we had was made for only lovers and not for best friends.

I slid into Embry's truck as Edward opened the door for me. It was old, pretty beat up, but it sure as hell beat being looked at by all those people of the porch. It felt like they were strangers - even Jasper. "You have some explaining to do Mister" I whispered as Edward slid in beside me and took my hand.

Kissing it lightly, I could feel him smile against my hand. "Of course. All of your questions will be answered. It's only about 10 minutes to Embry's so enjoy the ride"

I sucked in a greedy gust of air when his fingertips brushed against my neck and his lips planted a tiny kiss there. If Edward seriously thought he could do that and get away with that, he was oh so wrong.


	5. Chapter 5

**I do not own Twilight**

* * *

[ Chapter Five ]

There are these times in life when everything around you is in absolute chaos; when everything is too loud, too bright and too confusing.

Only suddenly, you see a light from the heavens shine down on you from parted clouds. You hear angelic voices, the light is warm, every thing is so soft and it suddenly dawns on you.

The meaning of life.

The meaning of every choice you have made and why it has led you here to this most perfect point in your life. Where things that never made sense before, make _absolute_ sense - where you just _get_ it.

Well - _This_ was not one of those fucking times.

This was Hell.

The room was in a deep silence and the only thing that could be heard was Edward's light breathing - due to the fact I was holding my breath, racking my brain for something to say, something polite, non hurtful, perhaps even a little sexy-

"So you're blind?" _Stupid, stupid woman_, I cursed mentally. There was something seriously wrong with me.

Edward gave me what I least expected. It was this smirk, this cocky arrogant smirk that screamed for his lips to either be kissed or ripped off. It was totally sexy, a panty dropper if I'd ever seen one, where I wanted to lick the corners of his mouth and pull on his hair.

Why oh why did he have to rub his neck like that? Those hands sweeping across his throat to reach around and scratch his hair. Hmm...

Oh yeah, cause I'm in Hell.

"I think we have already established that." He chuckled a little making my stomach clench. "And most prefer vision impaired."

"Oh" I said softly, wanting to punch myself in the face.

This, hands down, was the weirdest conversation I have ever had. It even trumped the whole 'I am in love with a chick' speech from my mother.

It still creeped me out that my own mother was dating a chick who was only 10 years older than I was. Angela Webber was this shy but very intelligent, introvert woman. However, that perception flew out the window the day I caught her and my mother dry humping and making out like teenage frat girls on the couch, celebrating Delta Phi's successful annual 'shake n bake'.

Shit - _visions_. Now my girl boner was totally dead.

"Why are you sitting all the way over there? Why don't you come sit by me?" Edward asked in his smooth yet slightly husky voice while swiping his hand across the bed spread trying to entice me to the comfortable bed. Damn if that didn't make that bed look _more _inviting.

"I'm fine where I am, thanks." I replied, loosely crossing my arms over my chest and scanning the room.

The room looked like a normal spare room. Plain blue cotton sheets, side table, lamp, void of any personal items except for a couple of brown packing boxes in the corner. It did however feel a little stuffy and I couldn't be sure if it was because the window looked like it hadn't been opened in years, or because each breath I took I could literally taste his cologne on the tip of my tongue.

"Right." He huffed, stretching back a little to lean his palms on the comforter, allowing him to cross his ankles. "So you're just going to stand over there _all_ night?"

"Maybe." I shrugged not really knowing what to say next.

My main problem was that part of his shirt had caught up near his belt, giving me a tiny slither of exposed flesh over his stomach. The bastard was fine – I'd give him that much. I almost let out a groan once my eyes caught the trail of hair that led down to what seemed to be his permanent bulge.

My nipples hardened just thinking about all the nasty things we could be doing instead of talking. His face, my thighs, screaming, moaning - perfection.

Hearing a knock at the door snapped me out of the thoughts of telling Edward to shut his fine ass up and straddling his waist.

"Hey," Embry smiled, eying me appreciatively and not even taking note of his supposed _cousin _on the bed. "Thought you guys might need some extra sheets and a bag." Holding up the orange sleeping back I took it graciously and watched him half close the door.

"Thanks." I muttered.

"No probs. Oh and Edward-"

"Yeah." He replied smoothly, still looking in my direction.

"Condoms are in the top drawer."

Before I could even make my way across the room to throw the hot lamp at him, the door was closed and his chuckle resounded down the hall. Smug little shit. I should stick his hand in the blender he decided to 'lift' from the mansion.

"How thoughtful." Edward laughed, his grin stretching across his face.

"You're both imbeciles" I snapped, throwing out the sleeping bag and arranging it on the floor. "And I hope you don't think you're getting lucky tonight Eddie -"

"Funny; I was going to say the same about you." He grinned, reaching for the hem of his shirt and pulling it over his head.

My breath caught in my throat once the white material hit the ground. He was even better than in my mind. His chest was broad, but not scary huge like Brady's and his stomach muscles were lick-able as I watched him thread his fingers together and stretch his arms in the air.

He was an asshole. A low down dirty scumbag. This was plain torture and he knew it by the little smirk that had replaced the smile.

"Cat got your tongue Leah?"

Oh this guy was going to be the death of me. And trust me, if he mentioned anything about tongues again I was going to shove mine back down his throat.

"N-no," I stuttered out, thankful that he couldn't see the bright red blush moving across my olive skin as I kneeled down on the floor, ready to beat the shit out of the pillow Embry had handed me out of pure sexual frustration. "Of course not."

"Well then-" He exclaimed, pawing at his chest obviously to divert my attention there. "Why don't you come up here and put it to use."

I almost snorted immediately. "Really? What happened to the whole shy guy routine?"

"I may be shy, but I'm still a guy."

"Unbelievable." I scoffed, rolling my eyes while getting back to my feet. There was no way in Hell I would be able to sleep in here with jeans on. It would be like being wrapped up by an Anaconda in my sleep.

"Do you think Embry has any spare boxers in here somewhere?" I asked, rifling around the top drawer.

"You can always use mine."

"And what will you use in the interim?"

"I sleep naked so it's no big deal." He shrugged, as he slowly undid his belt.

If possible my hand clutched tighter to the top of the wooden drawers. I didn't have the guts to turn around, I couldn't. My breath was shaky as I tried to calm myself down, reciting a stupid nursery rhyme I'd learned in grade school. As I was half way through my song I felt a sudden silk touch against my back. Looking over my shoulder and down at the ground I almost groaned, but had the incentive to bite down on my bottom lip before I could. In a piled heap near my ankles sat his boxers. Blue. Dark Blue.

"You sure you don't want to come and join me?" Edward asked as my eyes remained fixed on the boxers. _Don't look up girl. Don't do it._

"Motherfucker." I breathed watching as Edward slipped under the cool blue sheet and feeling somewhat jealous of how it lay across his torso.

Quickly without another word, I dived for the bedroom light and scurried under the sleeping bag. Given that Embry must have used the bag for midgets, I couldn't zip up the bag and just lay on top of it, my feet hanging over. The floor was hard and my back was killing me from being stuck in the car for what felt like eternity.

"You okay down there?" Edward whispered. "Gosh... this bed is so soft, so nice-"

"I hate you." I grumbled out, turning on to my side feeling my hip digging into the floor.

"How about you come up here and let me change your mind." He answered, the lace and promise of sex lacing his voice.

"You better be careful Cullen. You might just get what you wish for." I mumbled into the pillow.

After a half an hour and six different attempts to get comfortable, I sighed and crawled to my knees, peeking my head over the bed. Edward's breath sounded even and I hoped to god he was asleep. I couldn't sleep on the floor and if I slid softly and tried not to make any sound I might have been able to slip in beside him and get some shuteye on the marvelous looking bed.

Crawling around to the opposite side, I slid softly on to the bed making sure not to make too much of it bend towards me. My heart was thumping in my chest but I was pretty sure I was holding my breath for fear of being discovered. Placing my pillow in between us I hesitantly placed my head down on the head of the bed. The room was dark but I could see Edward's faint outline. I could see his chest rising up and down and the way the shadows crawled over his face. If the moment wasn't so creepy already I might have called him beautiful.

"I knew you'd give in." Edward whispered, turning his face toward me and smiling.

"My back hurts so don't get too excited stud." I grumbled as I placed my hands under my cheek as I faced him.

Letting out a steady breath, Edward's hand rose to near my face and I watched as his fingers flexed and his brows scrunched in concentration. "Can I see your smile?" He asked sweetly, almost humming out a tune.

Pulling back a little, I shuffled in the bed. Of everything I had been expecting something different. "Ah-" I panicked, not sure I should be giving into his request.

"Please Leah, just once." He whispered, his hot breath rushing me like a star line backer straight out of college.

"Fine" I grunted, trying to hide the face that inside I was turning all gooey and weird. The feeling was hard to explain and strange as shit. Timidly I took his hand in my own and couldn't help but notice how soft they were, how truly warm his palms were.

Lifting his hand to my face, I could see his expression change. There was a small smile breaking on the side of his lips and it made me want to slap him for being so down right hot. In all honesty, it wasn't fair. I was here, lying in a warm bed with one of the hottest guys on the planet and all he wanted to do was touch my smile? How about touch me where I need you Edward?

His hand cupped my face as soon as his fingertips brushed my cheek. He was all inviting as he shuffled closer under the blanket and propped himself up on one elbow so he was almost hovering over me. Gently he began running his thumb over my lips, carefully, almost afraid he was going to break them. The action reminded me of the imaginary feeling of having a butterfly flapping against ones lips. It was so tender and fragile I almost wanted to punch him for making me feel like a girly girl.

"Smile, Leah." He hummed, resting his thumb against the side of my mouth, his other fingers playing with my ear.

Rolling my eyes, I gave him a small smile before letting it drop. Smiling wasn't my thing. I didn't smile. Nope, not me.

"Again." He whispered, angling down so he was actually hovering over me. It didn't take a genius to realise that this was going into the realms of dangerous. Not only did I want to wrap my legs around his waist, I wanted to slam him back against the bed and grind against him.

With the sheets twisted I could still feel his hardened body and told myself 'today is a good day' and dragged him closer. By the time his nose pressed against mine, his fingers had weaved themselves in my hair and the full weight of his body lay atop me, my legs welcoming him wholeheartedly.

"Let me taste your smile." Edward whispered, drowning everything else that was swirling around in my mind out. I couldn't believe this guy. He was just too smooth for his own good. I even had the audacity to squeak when he pressed his lips to mine, catching my bottom lip perfectly as he pulled away.

Edward was definitely my devil in a blue dress and I wanted to go all the way to Hell with him.

And I planned to.

* * *

**Thanks to my beautiful saviour Ellie for beta-ing! Love you!**


End file.
